“If your dog is fat, you aren’t getting enough exercise” — Unknown
“Some days you’re the dog; some days you’re the hydrant.” — Unknown
“Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot about puppies.” — Gene Hill
“In dog years, I’m dead.” — Unknown
“To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.” — Aldous Huxley
“A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.” — Robert Benchley
“Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that’s how dogs spend their lives.” — Sue Murphy
“I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven’t got the guts to bite people themselves.” — August Strindberg
“No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.” — Fran Lebowitz
“Ever consider what they must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul — chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we’re the greatest hunters on earth!” — Anne Tyler
“I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.” — Rita Rudner
“My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. That’s almost $7.00 in dog money.” — Joe Weinstein
“If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.” — James Thurber
“You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person with pets.” — Nora Ephron
“Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.” — Ann Landers
“Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.” — Robert A. Heinlein
“In order to keep a true perspective of one’s importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.” — Dereke Bruce, Taipei, Taiwan
“Of all the things I miss from veterinary practice, puppy breath is one of the most fond memories!” — Dr. Tom Cat
“There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.” — Ben Williams
“When a man’s best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.” — Edward Abbey
“Cat’s motto: No matter what you’ve done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it.” — Unknown
